Bah! You should read this guys blog. He's funny...and he's called Black Hockey Jesus...and his blog has the best. title. evar!
I've been laughing and I've had the odd tear too.
And no, I'm not linking it for whorepoints...It's friday Thursday afternoon and you should read some good shit.
Anyone know how to train a cat to use a catflap?
Or stop one headbutting you in the face at 5am?
...goggles!
Also, I'm seriously considering getting one of these and building my own "laptop"...hey, I've done geekier things in the past!
A "creationist zoo" can be fun!
On Saturday Ian and I took Ez and Flo to "Noah's Ark Farm Zoo Thing With Barns and Creationism". It was, quite frankly, better than Bristol Zoo! Ez's favourite is Gerald the Giraffe, while Flo (and I) liked the (incredibly noisy) Whooping Gibbons. Ian did most of the animal photography, while I captured some of the activity in the "Hay Barn".
Then it was back to mine for some juice and a sit down. I tried to get them to watch Tron but there were too many questions! Flo fell asleep and I instructed Ez on the finer points of feeding Moshi and then we played some "music" (read: made hideous noises with guitar and piano).See here. Now, what they fail to understand (and here a tip of the hat to The Register) is the fact that a year's worth of WiFi radiation is the equivalent of 20 minutes on a mobile phone!!
And I do believe I'm speaking from a position of authority when it comes to mobile phones.
Stay tuned for an exciting "Weird Shit My Cat Does" post.
So. My HTC Diamond finally decided to find the photos I took while on holiday with Flo...Yay!
"Swimmin"
"I am angry with you, daddy....go in the hallway!"
OMGWTFBBQ!!!!1!1!!one.....teh cute!See hereand here.
The comments on the first link made teh lol...for fucks sake, there's so many CCTV cameras around you'd think people'd be complaining more about them rather than the opportunity to walk around Bristol holding up a piece of card saying "Fuck You Google" hoping to get Google Mapped!
That's all for now...My pussy needs some lovin'.
Almost forgot I had a blog there.
Lots has been happening, but due to a really odd problem with my phone I lost just over a weeks worth of awesome pictures...Including Flo "swimming" at the beach (imagine a tiny walrus commando-crawling through a sandy puddle) and the cutest "cute cat + cute child" photo on teh internets evar.
So. Anyway. Something with some more substance when I can get round to it...and in the meantime...here's "Moshi"!
That's right bitches, I gots me some pussy!
Hello there!
Long time no see. Sorry about that; I've been a bit busy. Not only have I become obsessed with "adult colouring in", interesting "music" machines and gardening but I've been uber-busy "mit Arbiet" and also in Paris. All of which, more later...
Let's see...Tuesday night was interesting. I spent the evening with both the front and back doors open in the hope of airing the house while I pottered around between the kitchen, garden and lounge. At some point I neglected to notice a visitor..Perhaps it was because I was obsessively colouring in intricate mandalas...or perhaps it was the solder fumes from my solar theremin project. But I digress, Midnight came and I decided it really was time to pack for the trip and to get my head down for the night. As I headed upstairs I heard a rumble in my bedroom and as I rounded the corner a ball of black lightning streaked (struck? stroked?) past me and proceded to bounce between landing and stairs in an unlikely attempt to make its way past me.
I had a cat.
He zipped around the kitchen while I tried to get the back door open. Havoc was caused. Patches of fur werte left attached to my cactus. Whooping noises were made.
Eventually he figured out how to get out and he sped through the garden and over the wall.
I went to bed.
Straight out of the house in the morning and off to Paris. Sat in 2 days worth of meetings...Yawn. Went for beer and football with the boss...Yay. The highlight was a Lebanese company (who deployed this particular IT solution in Afghanistan...it's mobiles...remember the Taliban demanding all the transmitters being turned off between 6pm and 9am?...that kind of thing) saying, "We are very used to deploying in difficult situations. It does not disturb us".
The journey back was...Interesting. Everything was going well; we'd mosied back through Paris to the airport, checked in (having eventually figured out which way up the passports go in the automated check-in machine), wandered over to passport control, when...wait! Why is everyone standing around? Why are there guys with guns standing in rows preventing people moving around...what's that van outside with some dudes in protective clothing doing?
Oh wow! Bomb scare!
Oh shit! This is going to make it tricky to get on the plane...
We went outside and debated our options (and smoked)...the only option was to wait a bit, hope it all worked out, or try to wangle an emergency booking on the Squeezyjet flight a couple of hours later.
Luckily, adfter about half an hour there was a loud "pop" and about 10 minutes after that the gates were besieged by 1000000000000 people trying to get through security at once. We toughed it out and just about made it to our gate...only to find the flight delayed by 30 mins.
Got home eventually and even managed not to get shivved as I wandered through the murkier parts of Bristol late on a Friday night.
I got home about half ten in the end. But lo...I wonder why the house smells a bit...different? Oh well, it's been closed up for the last 3 days...meh...chuck my bag in the kitchen, figure I'll have a little nightcap and a bit of TV. Wander into the lounge to find a nice dried up cat shit in my fireplace.
Bastard cat.
Clean that up. Sit down...why's the sofa wet? What is that musty smell...Oh wow. Cat piss!
Bastard. Cat.
So. Saturday was spent washing throws & cushions and generally defenestrating the feline miasma. Flo and I had a lovely tea and then spent Sunday riding round St Werbs on our horses...
Flo's horse is called "Heearku" (as near as I can make out)....I think this is Atchitaka's horse (don't ask).
Saturday nights dinner could not have been more local: Lamb from down the road. Beans, onions and carrots from my mate Charley's allotment, potatoes, sorrel and spinach from my back garden. Yummy!
My "jungle" as Flo calls it. Rocket, nasturtium, calendula, potatoes, sweetcorn, borage...pansies.
My outdoor "office", more potatoes and borage...Sorrel, nasturtium and chervil.
"I'm Atchitaka being a mermaid!" (don't ask)
Chocolate croissant, porridge with blueberries...breakfast...any opportunity to get mucky!
We got to the farm early. Just right for feeding time...them goats is hungry. Flo is sporting her "coat in a bag", which she thinks is amazing (I think it's pretty awesome myself!)
We rocked some tats! (yes, that is an ice cream in her other hand)
It was very windy, which led to a game of "Blown Away". This basically involves spinning in circles shrieking and then suddenly collapsing on the floor...having no fear of looking like a fool I readily join in with these games...people round my way must think I'm a loon.
More garden produce. Summer Salad: Rocket, Sorrel and Spinach with Nasturtium and Borage flowers...spicy!
Flo playing with the "nature garden" (not a lot going on yet). She's got some plastic bugs, spiders and frogs in the little pond...if I could get her to stop playing in it, there might be some real "nature" hanging out there one day.
Improvised sun hat FTW! That's an old shower cap, which Flo refers to as her "Bakers Hat"...it was scorching in that corner, plus my garden is nicely sheltered so there wasn't much wind to cool us down.
Wind!As Flo said to me on numerous occasions yesterday.
We had a lovely time pottering around the 'hood.
I gave her a choice of an action man comic (with free action man dude) or the princess magazine which Flo chose herself...the inevitable happened...but she did have a lot of fun with the lipstick.Zoo Membership came through, which essentially means we can go whenever we want for as long (or short) as we want...awesome!
Prairie Dawgs!
Meerkats are awesome!
Making sure the coast is clear!
