Daddies!*
I was going to do one of those dad-centric posts, but B055Man's bad news keeps freaking me out.
So you get a bog-standard w'appen post...with a groovy slideshow at the end...don't just scroll down. Read this you fuckers! :)
Friday night lent itself to getting mangled. I toasted that chalice like it was in the palace...
Saturday was spent regretting it...but I did achieve a 9am lie-in. Cleaned up and then spent about 4 hours making a chicken stew for me & Flo that should probably have taken an hour (bar cooking time). JP came round with his latest purchase, a two-wheeled death machine....I guess it matches the 4-wheeled death machine he also has.
Somehow, she kept her nappy on all night. Managed to shout "Rice. Milk!" repeatedly at me when I tried to fob her off with water at 4am...at which point the nappy came off. I swear, it's some kind of dirty protest. But all in all a nice quiet morning....until we went to the farm and found the "baby kiks!". One of whom has a gammy leg (there's a sign up, it's in no pain...) to which Flo says "ah, poor darlin'" or "poke it?".
Don't get me started on her "death kick". Which in the garden is almost literal....e.g:
Flo: Oh mouse...
Me: Yeah, a wood louse....wood. louse.
Flo: Mouse!
Me: Yeah he's lovely isn't he.
Flo: [stamps on woodlouse] Mouse?
Me: Yep. He's dead...
Flo: Spider?....
...
Flo: [smashing spider with a plastic kiddie spade] Pider. Pider! PIE-DAR!
Me: What was he doing? Poor spider!
Flo: Aaaaw. Sowwy darlin! Sowwy.
Snails, (or "Nail") are exempt apparently. I'm rarely aloud to touch one if she sees one (if I do get hold of the fecker though it's over the fence it goes), instead she offers a "house, nail house?" to any available toys with mouths..I follow and attempt to subvert the behaviour.
As we buggied past Mothercare (agh!) today Flo demanded to "go inneeeer!"....so against my better judgement we did. Lo, I hated it as before but on the way out a "SALE" sign caught my eye....some judicious perusing of the boys clothes eventually led me to the coolest pair of trousers (aka "tau-zis") I've ever found...rummage, rummage, rummage == T-Shirt (unfortunately French). Both of which were less than half price!
Why don't I have this skill for my own wardrobe?
She loves a bit of "washing up", and is actually quite skilled at cleaning....not so skilled at keeping dry.
*Yep, she still calls dogs "daddy"...
