Tiny Ginger Lepton Avoider

Heh. Beat that for an event that was never going to live up to the idiot-hype!

I am anxious to hear how Flo feels about particle physics after her declaration the other day.

While demonstrating teh awesome device, some friends and I happened upon exactly why (with particle physics) you do the -1 and then divide....took 3 laymen, but we sorted it: uncertainty!

I'm off to play ukulele!

Wherein Granny Jan finds my ulterior motive behind the birthday present for Flo!

Pussy Printer

It's not moshi, though it does look a bit like her....if I know moshi though, she would do exactly the same.

This morning, at 5am, she jumped on the bed, purred for a bit and then bit my nose.

The Cat Bitch Tramp Trip

No, I couldn't come up with a betterest post title either. This is a geek/life/cat/child/work related post, brought to you by...teh satan stanzarizer!*

3 [three] pomes [drivel]!!!

Part 1 - The Geek Bitch
O little acer
I apologise for unintentionally
Giving you a metaphorical
Dirty Sanchez.
I appreciate now why you stopped booting;
It was inappropriate of me to expect so much.
Sorry about that.

Thanks, though,
For being so easy to recover
And giving a few people a laugh
Just because I'd "bricked" something within hours.
Again.
Nor, did you fsck me over like that triple-boot
I attempted
Once
On someone else's machine.

Maybe I _will_ take you to belgium after all!

BTW. Moshi, why the fuck
Can't I put anything
On any
Surface in my own
House without you knocking it to the floor?
viz. _4_ glasses, 2 _not_ empty coffee cups, countless hair-band-things and a FUCKING KETTLE!

Part 2 - Trip
So.
Brussels & back in a day.
Great!
4:30 start and home 18 hours later.
If all goes well.
Bastards!

Part 3 - Tramp
Can I go bounce now daddy?
Yep.
Sssssaaaaank Yoooouuuuu.....eeeeheeeheeeheehehee!!!!
Bounce. Bounce. Bounce. Bounce Bounce. Bounce Bounce. Bounce Bounce. Bounce. Bounce. Bounce, Bounce. Bounce, Bounce. Bounce....
Nukkatmeeee Daddeeee!!!


[bow like a prince] thank you [/bow]

*Coffee and a sudden hatred of myself for loving algebra!

The Acer of Spades

Yay! Acer arrived...less than a minute to get it into "advanced mode" and now boasting VLC, Skype, Flash, yadda teh fuckin' yadda...all that shizzle's on my nizzle!

Boot-time (~20 seconds), lightness, size and SDHC are rockin' my boots....though I'd still not recommend it for an ultra-n00b....also features a 1 week delay due to Dixons being a bunch of useless fucking wankers, and an extra day thanks to the stupid-as-fuck couriers. If I'd not bothered looking and then complaining it still wouldn't be here!

Whining about that has saved me £35 quid, so in retrospect: I could have had it 2 weeks ago and paid £250 including the cards....or, as it is, £185 including the cards...meh...

Flo, on the other hand has already sussed teh bubble game! But the "tramboleen" is still winning...

CAKE!

Pome

Oh Acer will you arrive on Friday?
The scheduled day
I need you in order to deprive
Bill Gates
Of His joy
And with a ~15 second boot-time I will love you
I will worship at thy linux fount.
I will hack the fuck out of you also...

You will never be perfect; nothing is
But it shits on the Sony Vaio
The Idiot just bought
For too much money
And is probably botnetted...
Ha.
Ha!

Back To The Future

Some video & a pic by Granny Jan & Grandad from back in the day...well the visit before last at least. I wont put any of the (last) Christmas ones up, mainly coz they feature me in full-on bad hair/beard mode...and also cos I don't know if Joe & T want their faces on teh intertubes...also they're quite sizable...also, I'm lazy.

Trundlin'

Cheeze!

Filf!

Given the enjoyment enjoyed (?) by Flo on the trampoline last week....here's the mini-version I got for her birthday. I suspect that she'll shit herself when she sees it.


In a good way.

I spent most of the weekend resisting the urge to spoil the surprise by putting it together there and then. Probably just as well I did. I put it together on Sunday night after Flo had gone back to Rosie's...much swearing, sweating and straining later I'd only cut myself 4 times.

Seaside. Flo spent several hours being "Hearku runnin' in the sea"

Princess of Power!

And...Happy Birthday Ma!

Bouncin'

That's how we roll...on the neighbour's mega-trampoline.

I have bought her a small one for her birthday next week...the smallest I could find (at 4.5 ft) will still take up the vast majority of my garden...hey ho.

Catfish...

ing...

Anno Gurii!

Sunday morning "playing ano"...


Sunday afternoon...performing for Moshi!

Rumours...

...of my demise are greatly exaggerated (man, my spelling brain ain't working tonight...none of that looks right).

So. What's been happening?

Moshi had half her face eaten by a yeti*. Poor dude. She was not cool for a few days, but a couple of hundred quid at the vet and some cat-soup (yum) and these things sort themselves out. Cat-soup is not something I'll be making again in a hurry...especially at 6am with a minor hangover. Ask for the recipe if you dare!

I built a small patio (like, way small) and bodged up a tiny (like, tiny) wall.

I got an HTC Raphael...and it doesn't suck....yet. The Diamond stopped working aurally (heh).

Everyone at work seems to be on holiday...can you believe I had email in single figures today? OK, I had 4 hours of phone calls, but still...

I just explained procreation to a (nearly) 3-year-old thus: Half of you was in daddy and half of you was in mummy and we decided to make a 'you' by putting the two halves together to make a one. And you became a little blob of life, then you grew inside your mummy for almost a year and then you came out with your arms and legs and your head and your hair and you were a whole human being and I loved you as soon as I saw you.

Flo: And...did I die?
Me: No, honey.
Flo: But you cried!
Me: [silence] how the fuck? [/silence] You make me cry and laugh all the time!
Flo: Yeeeaaaah...I'm funny!

I donated "bonobo" to Rose because it was mainly doing my head in getting all hot on my lap like some kind of poledancer (or cat. I forgot how fucking uncomfortable they can be, what with the claws and the higher body temperature and shit) and was tempted by another Lenovo replacement....but I've been sold on the MSI Wind (rebadged as Advent from PCWB).

So that's 300 nicker for the basics delivered and I'll be replacing the wifi and hard-drive (I think 320Gb FTW!), adding some RAM and sticking my (lovingly honed) version of Xubuntu on there. I've also recently boosted up a 4Gb pendrive with not 1, but 2 bootable linux distros...and they share the same 'home' partition on the drive...I should do a howto soon.

At least I can stop using work laptop at home.+





* This is an exaggeration. Moshi got bit on the snout by a bigger cat and ended up with a big cut on her lower jaw and a broken tooth.

+ It's that or sit in a cupboard with the server, KVM switches, cardboard boxes, and a keyboard on my lap.

Jealousy

Bah! You should read this guys blog. He's funny...and he's called Black Hockey Jesus...and his blog has the best. title. evar!

I've been laughing and I've had the odd tear too.

And no, I'm not linking it for whorepoints...It's friday Thursday afternoon and you should read some good shit.

Anyone know how to train a cat to use a catflap?

Or stop one headbutting you in the face at 5am?

The Mind...

...goggles!


Also, I'm seriously considering getting one of these and building my own "laptop"...hey, I've done geekier things in the past!

Who'd a thunk it?

A "creationist zoo" can be fun!


On Saturday Ian and I took Ez and Flo to "Noah's Ark Farm Zoo Thing With Barns and Creationism". It was, quite frankly, better than Bristol Zoo! Ez's favourite is Gerald the Giraffe, while Flo (and I) liked the (incredibly noisy) Whooping Gibbons. Ian did most of the animal photography, while I captured some of the activity in the "Hay Barn".

It's a wicked day out as long as your anger lobes can handle things like the poster that compares the "Evolution of Transport" to the "Evolution of Life on Earth" (yeah, fuckheads that'll work!).

After a lot of running around getting hot and grumpy Ian dropped the girls and me back at mine. Ez wanted to stay for a bit, so after clearing it with Teh Mumma, I made it so. We had dinner and then she went home while Flo stayed the night.

At this point I would like you to compare the result of saying "You can eat your puddings any way you like!"

Esmae...


Flo...

On Sunday morning (after Flo went back to her mums) while cooking a huge pot of brocolli soup I could hear the strains of lump-hammer on concrete, industrious digging and children shrieking emanating from Rosie's place...rather than fill her tiny back garden with more bodies I offered to take the kids for the afternoon.

We had an awesome time in the park. I was a robot, the girls screamed and ran.

Then it was back to mine for some juice and a sit down. I tried to get them to watch Tron but there were too many questions! Flo fell asleep and I instructed Ez on the finer points of feeding Moshi and then we played some "music" (read: made hideous noises with guitar and piano).

Apologies to Bucky for not attending "Sacre Bleu"...you can post that video of me "dancing" now if you like dude. Heh.